The Brain's Natural Warning System

Hey, how's it going? How's the weather? My mom's picking me up here in, like, 10 minutes. Do you like Star Wars? I have the entire action figure collection. Yeah, it's really cool, 'cause I'm 35, but I have more figures than most kids.

Hey, want to hear me recite an entire scene from the movie "Highlander"? Oh, it's so cool! Okay, I'll be MacLeod, and you just be Kurgan. Okay, here we go. "Kurgan, you're afraid of me. That's why you needed the woman. You didn't think you could take me."

Umm, it's your line. Come on! You're supposed to scream, "LIES!" That's the best part! What do you mean you don't like "Highlander"? Oh well. It's no biggie. I still love you.

I'll bet my mom would love you, too. A lot of people say I look like her. We should look alike, since we've lived together for so long! She loves any girl I bring home. Ha! Not that I've brought any home, let alone a whole lot! Ha ha!

You should seriously come see my room. I have, like, 100 stuffed animals. Girls like stuffed animals, right? See, that's why I don't understand why girls don't come hang out with me more often.

Yeah, that is a peculiar smell. I only shower, like, once a week. My mom tries to make me do it every day, but I just close the bathroom door and turn the water on. She never knows the difference. I'm pretty smooth like that. My room gets kinda stinky, but you get used to the smell after a while.

Hey! Where are you going? You haven't given me your phone number yet! How am I supposed to call you a few hours from now? Why are you running? Don't be ashamed of your love for me! WE HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON!!!